Could You Win The Newlywed Game?

Usually the mornings around here are a bit on the crazy side, and require us to tag team. One of us stays with the kids, making sure everyone gets fed and dressed and chores done, while the other gets ready for the day. Then we switch.

But I guess the kids were abducted by aliens on Tuesday night because they were perfectly behaved Wednesday morning, allowing us to get ready at the same time and actually have a real conversation. It began with me complaining about something inconsequential, and morphed into something completely different. Which, honestly, is the way it usually goes....

I wouldn't worry too much about it, you'll get over it

Um, ok. 

Ok? What, you don't think so?

Well, I've been told that I hold a grudge so maybe I'll stay upset forever

 I have seen you let things go. It may still bother you from time to time, but you don't hold on to things the way you think you do. 

If you say so.

I do. I have been married to you for almost nine years. I think I know you pretty well by now. 

Well, thanks honey. 

I mean, I don't know if I know you well enough that we'd win The Newlywed Game or anything, but I know you pretty darn well. 

Hold up....you just said you think you know me pretty darn well, and reminded me that we've almost been married for nine years, but you don't think we could win The Newlywed Game??

I just don't know if I could answer the kinds of questions they ask. 

What kind of questions do you think they ask?

Like, what elementary school did your wife go to? Or something. 

I'm pretty sure they've never asked that question before. 

Ok, then what's your wife's favorite food...

I'm pretty sure that's not the kind of question they ask either, but you seriously don't know my favorite food?

Is it creme brûlée?

Are you married to me or my mom?

I wouldn't have known that was your mom's favorite food! I mean, I guess I might say ice cream?

That'd be closer. Think about it for a minute. There's a shop that I like to go to, I spend way too much money there, I go far too often.....

Oh!! Cupcakes??

Um, yeah

Duh

Yeah. Duh. 

Anyway, I just mean that I'm not good at answering questions like that. Tami [his sister] and I played a game like that at a family reunion once and we lost. We got like none of the questions right. 

When you played that game with Tami, you didn't even get her birthday right!

Exactly! That's what I'm trying to tell you!

It doesn't help that I went to four elementary schools. 

See! That's another problem. 

You want to know which one was my favorite? I could give you a hint...it was named after an author...

Stanley Kubrick Elementary?

Um. No. That would have been terrifying. 

Hahahahahahahaha

And Stanley Kubrick wasn't even an author. 

It looks like he may be on to something, we probably won't be winning The Newlywed Game any time soon ;)